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Sherrie G. Ellenburg
- 39, Female
- North Carolina
- United States
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Sherrie G. Ellenburg's Groups
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Activists and Advocates
40 members
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Wives and Partners
88 members
Sherrie G. Ellenburg's Page
Profile Information
- Have you been diagnosed with prostate cancer?
- no
- What brings you to the New Prostate Cancer InfoLink social network?
- To share my experiences with other women and families. My husband was diagnosed at 42; he died at 43. I was a widow at 33 years old.
- Would you help us grow the network? Would you tell others about it?
- Definitely!
- About Me:
- My husband, Kenny, and I were married on June 17, 2000. It was the happiest day of my life. We had beautiful dreams for the future. I remember saying our vows as if it were only yesterday “…For richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.” My vows took on a deeper meaning when I heard the doctor say to Kenny, “You have Prostate Cancer.”
When Kenny was first diagnosed on November 24, 2003, I felt as if my whole world stopped at that moment. I could hardly see for the tears I could feel building inside me. But I didn’t want to fall apart. I wanted to be strong for my husband. As the doctor began to explain his diagnosis and possible options, I could see our dreams disappearing before our eyes.
In December 2003, Kenny and I traveled to Duke University for a second opinion. Where we were expecting to be given HOPE, we instead came home devastated. The doctors all came to the conclusion that Kenny’s cancer was too advanced for surgery. At 42 years of age, Kenny’s only treatment option was radiation with hormone therapy. It seemed as if the questions in my mind never ended. How would it make him feel? How could I help him? How would I ever be able to live my life without him? Where would we get the strength to make it through? How were we going to cope?
For a young couple, this was a lot to accept. We had only been married for 3 years. We were still on our honeymoon! Everyone is different but we learned talking to each other helped. We talked a lot about our fears. We talked about our lost dreams. We grieved the loss of the family we had hoped to have together. We laughed and loved more. We went on dates together. I watched Star Trek with him (I don’t like Star Trek!) and he watched “chick flick” movies (he tolerated them) with me. We made memories to last a lifetime.
Through it all, Kenny never complained. He never talked of the incredible pain. His only concern was for me. His last day home was spent doing the thing he loved most….cooking for me. I argued he needed to rest, but he argued I was sicker than him. Who could argue with someone who loved you that much to put you first above their own pain? I couldn’t. Not when I knew it gave him joy to care for me like it gave me joy to care for him.
Kenny always wanted to help others even in his pain. He once said, “If what I am going through helps just one person then it is worth it all.” He did his part by encouraging his family and friends to have their yearly exams. His brother, Bryan, was his first success story when a year after his death he was diagnosed through early detection.
I think my biggest frustration was dealing with the finances. How do you pay the bills when there is no income? What do you do when you don’t qualify for assistance? I had no idea where to turn for assistance. I didn’t want anyone to know how truly depressed I was. My experiences are what later inspired me to work with Women Against Prostate Cancer. I wanted to help others find help and hope. Because there is hope that you will make it through this difficult time. You are not alone!
Twenty months after Kenny was diagnosed, he went to his heavenly home on August 3, 2005. Six weeks later, I was devastated to be told I had Ovarian Cancer. I am cancer-free today! Because of my experiences with cancer, I knew the importance of early detection. A year after Kenny’s death, I began educating my community about Prostate Health. In the past two years, I have dedicated my time to the Prostate Cancer Coalition of North Carolina and Women Against Prostate Cancer. It’s my hope that we can help other families avoid the pain we suffered. For more information, please visit www.womenagainstprostatecancer.org or www.pccnc.org .
On our wedding day everything was perfect! The weather was so beautiful it was like God was shining down his blessings to us. I remember the happiness we both felt. Life couldn't get any better. But shortly into our marriage, we both became seriously ill. It seemed our life had become a constant struggle. We struggled with our health and we struggled with our finances.
How could our life have taken such a sharp turn? I believe it was God's plan. Because, you see, God has a plan for everyone's life. On November 24, 2003 our world was turned upside down when Kenny was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer. The doctor said he was too young to consider testing for Prostate Cancer. But the tests said differently. The journey of learning how to cope with Prostate Cancer was long and difficult. But it was worth every moment. I have no regrets. I have many happy moments. Through the many struggles we faced, I learned that if you face it together with trust and love nothing is impossible.
- Website:
- http://myspace.com/gracie1970
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Any person who appears to knowingly render medical advice or promote a professional or commercial service on this site may be removed by the administrators without notice.
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The "New" Prostate Cancer InfoLink is not a substitute for professional care. If you have or suspect you may have a health problem, please consult your health care provider.
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Comment Wall (14 comments)
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If a man goes to his Dr and requests a PSA test the Dr in my opinion has no right to refuse!!! In some cases even for men over 30 if they have family members with it. The best to you in your work...and in your life.
Ron
Your story is so very important, especially today with much in the news poo pooing testing for P cancer. Thanks for sharing.
Ron
I'm just glad I ran into them last weekend!
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